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  • Connor Ewens

Fantasy Booking: WWE Royal Rumble 2024

It's the most, Rumblest tiiiime of the yearrrr. I friggin LOVE the Royal Rumble. As the saying goes, "even a bad rumble is a good rumble" because the format is so damn fun. 1995, 2015 and 2022 can get to stepping though. Last year the Rumble winners felt a little predictable. Rhea Ripley was on a dominant rise as the biggest female star in the company. Cody Rhodes was making his in ring return after a serious injury and was a clear shoe-in to challenge Roman Reigns at Wrestlemania. Whilst they were predictable, they were definitely the right choices. This year, both rumbles are much more unpredictable. Bayley winning the women's rumble feels like the most obvious choice, but I feel like her failing is going to be the bigger story to continue the dissension within Damage CTRL.

Nia Jax could be a contender I guess, Becky Lynch or Bianca Belair could do it a second time. There doesn't feel like one sole clear favourite to win, unless a certain Boss decides to return. Over in the men's you have your usual culprits. Drew McIntyre, Brock Lesnar (please not again). The Rock I guess but there are two very clear favourites on who should win. Cody Rhodes or CM Punk. The IWC are losing their minds currently on who should win, who will finish their story and what possible surprises will we get at the most regal tussle of them all. Well, let me have a go at how it should play out. As of writing (14/01/24) there has only been a handful of confirmed entrants for both rumbles but I will include them and also as much of a fantasy booking this is, I will try keep it as realistic as possible. Therefore, those who are out injured and definitely won't be at the rumble, I will not book in the rumble. Sounds good? Let's go. Just for giggles, here is what the rest of the card looks like in my little world:

  • Roman Reigns (c) vs LA Knight vs Randy Orton vs AJ Styles - Undisputed Championship

  • Logan Paul (c) vs Kevin Owens - US Championship

  • Katana Chance & Kayden Carter (c) vs Asuka & Kairi Sane - Women's Tag Championships

Women's Royal Rumble

Straight off the bat, Charlotte Flair just had knee surgery and won't return until late October and Alexa Bliss only gave birth 2 months ago. Becky Lynch returned to the ring 6 months after giving birth which I thought was very quick, so I doubt Alexa will break the record. Raquel Rodriguez recently revealed she has Mast Cell Activation Syndrome so I doubt she will be wrestling anytime soon. Cora Jade recently picked up an injury at a house show, though it is unclear how serious it will be I am also going to keep her out though I did plan on booking her. I think that is all the people who won't be in the rumble. Here is who is.

Entrant number 1 starts with Big Time Becks, Becky Lynch. She patiently waits for number 2 who is, the returning Trish Stratus. They had a great feud last year with one of the best steel cage matches I've seen. We have a mini stare down before an immediate brawl between the two. Entrant 3, Natalya. She gets a few licks in, goes to do her double Sharpshooter spot but is kicked away. Lynch clotheslines her over the top for an elimination, Trish immediately tries to eliminate her but fails. Entrant 4 is Bayley. She has been tasked by Damage CTRL's true leader Dakota Kai to win the Rumble on her own, she will be our Iron-Woman. She gets into it with both women, who she has also had feuds with in recent years. Entrant 5 is Lash Legend from NXT flanked by her Meta-Four friends. She enters the rumble and sasses all of the veterans but is quickly dispatched by Lynch once again. Entrant 6 is Zoey Stark. She immediately stares down Trish, who tries to reform their alliance. Stark briefly thinks about it, before getting into it with her. 7 is the returning legend, Lita. How the fuck have Trish and Lita not shared the ring in the rumble yet? Lita attacks everyone before having the face to face with Trish, they go at back and forth both trying to eliminate each other. It looks like Trish might eliminate Lita, but in comes Zoey Stark to throw Trish out of the ring, hopefully a nice reaction. That continues their feud to be sorted out later on in the year, maybe Wrestlemania.

We're getting into the stage where we are going to have the ring fill up a little bit. Candace LeRae 8 then Tegan Nox at 9, Fallon Henley from NXT at 10, Indi Hartwell at 11 where she can work alongside LeRae. Tiffany Stratton also from NXT to come in at 12 and fight with Fallon Henley who has forced her to work on her ranch recently during their ongoing rivalry. Piper Niven at 13 then Michin at 14. I would also have Zoey Stark eliminate Lita, two eliminations over hall of famers is a big rub I think. Coming in next at 15, a returning Liv Morgan, should be a huge pop. She comes in and runs wild, has some great interactions with the top stars in the rumble and stands tall before number 16 enters, Nia Jax. Jax goes on a tear, destroying everyone in the match and scoring eliminations against Candace LeRae, Indi Hartwell & Zoey Stark. She is bragging about her dominance as the timer ticks down. Entrant 17, the debuting Jade Cargill. Jade and Nia have that big girl stare down before trading blows. Nia gets the upper hand but then Jade lifts her up with ease and dumps her out of the rumble. Cargill then eliminates Henley, Stratton and Michin taking her tally to 4, so far. She too stands tall and boasts her dominance before number 18 enters, Bianca Belair. This is the match we're setting up for Wrestlemania. An intense stare down before a brief exchange but Jade shockingly eliminates Bianca, who barely lasts in the match for a minute. Becky Lynch now gets in her face and those two have a fight. Piper Niven gets in amongst it, both Lynch & Cargill eliminate her and return to beating each other.

As Piper Niven is eliminated, her tag partner Chelsea Green enters at 19. Green enters and like the previous year she is immediately knocked over the top rope but this time she is not eliminated. She lands on the eliminated Niven and takes a seat on the steel steps to regain her composure. Entering at number 20, NXT's Thea Hail representing Chase U. She gets a nice little flurry in. Jade Cargill eliminates Tegan Nox taking her tally to 6. Ivy Nile enters at 21, immediately wanting to mix it up with Cargill which could be cool. Alba Fyre enters at 22 then Thea's BFF Jacy Jayne enters at number 23 and they do some nice tandem offence on everyone, before Jayne eliminates her friend claiming it is every woman for herself. A very early moment they can use to build a potential turn anytime in the distant future. Shotzi enters at 24. Cargill goes for a double elimination on Jayne & Green, Jayne is eliminated but again Green falls on top of someone and narrowly avoids her feet touching the floor, again retreating to the stairs to regroup. Becky is trying to get Ivy Nile out when Bayley swoops in and eliminates The Man, Becky will have lasted for over half an hour by that point so still a good run for her.

Number 25 entering is, the return of Naomi. I was torn whether or not to have her return as Trinity but I think Naomi is a more recognisable name for all WWE fans. Commentary can reference her reign as the TNA Knockouts Champion since the two companies seemingly could be best friends now. Naomi goes on a hot streak fighting anyone in her way, before standing across from Cargill (yes I am teasing every huge possibility) they go at it and it goes to a stalemate. Isla Dawn enters at number 26, she and Alba run wild on the women in the ring. They both go to eliminate Cargill together, Green tries to eliminate all 3 of them but fails and the 3 women are stood on the apron. Cargill knocks off both Alba & Isla taking her elimination total to 9, a new record for the women's rumble. She targets Green and launches her out the ring who again is saved from elimination by landing on Fyre & Dawn. The two Scots don't let her survive this time though, dropping her on the floor and eliminating her. Since Cargill threw her over, the elimination is hers and she is now at 10. Entering at 27 is Shayna Baszler who wants to choke everyone, how cute. She chokes out Shotzi and throws her out, she chokes out Liv Morgan who enjoys it a little too much but before she can lift her over the top she is targeting by Naomi, Shayna was her last opponent before her infamous walk out.

Entering at 28, Tamina. A Team Badd reunion who double team everyone in the rumble, eliminating Ivy Nile together. They try to overcome Jade Cargill together but she is too strong. Jade trash talks them both as the timer counts down. Number 29, Sasha Banks. I know, it's heavily rumoured her WWE talks are done and she will probably go elsewhere, but after the sheer amount of misinformation and poorly formed speculation in the last few years, I don't believe anything until I see it. The place comes unglued as Sasha returns, she hugs Naomi and Tamina before a huge stare down with Jade Cargill. The two come to blows, Naomi & Tamina aid her and all 3 women eliminate Jade from the match. Baszler charges at Sasha but is eliminated by both her and Naomi. Sasha turns around, face to face with Bayley. A lot of emotion and back story, some words are shared as Naomi and Tamina step alongside Sasha. It is a 3-on-1 until Liv Morgan stands alongside Bayley in a "I don't like you but we need to work together kind of way. The timer counts down to zero, number 30 is AJ Lee. I'm not expecting her to make a full time comeback, but I expect her to make a royal rumble cameo at least. She stands across from team Badd, it is 3v3 and I imagine "holy shit" chants. A big brawl breaks out, Bayley vs Sasha, Morgan vs Naomi & AJ vs Tamina. Tamina charges but AJ drops low and sends her over the top rope, at the exact same Liv charges at Naomi who drops and sends her over the top rope.

Final Four; Bayley, Sasha, Naomi & AJ. We get a nice mini match between AJ & Sasha which we have never seen before, AJ almost eliminates her but Bayley swoops in and saves Sasha by eliminating Lee. A three way stand-off, Naomi believes her and Sasha are going to eliminate Bayley first then fight it out, but Sasha swerves her and throws her out. Naomi smiles on the outside as if to say "you got me". Sasha & Bayley are left, at this point Damage CTRL come out on to the ramp to watch their "leader" win the match. Sasha verbally bashes Bayley for her role in the faction. A mini match to close the rumble, both women end up on the apron but Sasha strikes first and hardest, eliminating her former best friend and winning the rumble. As she celebrates, Bayley walks up the ramp as Damage CTRL stare daggers through her. We get a brief stare between Iyo Sky and Sasha Banks too, rounding off the segment.

I have included plenty of surprise returns for injured stars, legends and former talent. I have included call backs to past feuds whilst also setting up plenty of new ones. Jade Cargill debuted and looked like a beast with a women's record of 10 eliminations. The story of Bayley and Damage CTRL continues, eventually I would have her ousted from the group and eventually reunite with Sasha Banks ahead Wrestlemania, or have her help Sasha at Wrestlemania, solidifying her face turn then. If Sasha is to return, she has to win the rumble. It would be the perfect return and I am all down for an Iyo Sky vs Sasha Banks match at Wrestlemania. I would also have Jade Cargill vs Bianca Belair, Rhea Ripley should defend her title against "all comers" being Becky Lynch, Nia Jax and Liv Morgan. I'm unsure of Naomi's contract status with TNA so I haven't planned for her to be used past the rumble at all, but I think she had a good showing how I've booked it. This is how I would do the women's rumble, let me know what you think.

Men's Royal Rumble

Braun Strowman is recovering from a neck injury and is still rehabbing. Erik of the Viking Raiders is also out with a neck injury for the foreseeable future. Giovanni Vinci picked up a concussion recently which will probably rule him out for the rest of the month. Xavier Woods has taken some time off due recover from numerous injuries, nothing serious but I imagine he is also not going to make a rumble appearance. As much as I'd love to see it, I don't have much hope of a Big E appearance in a ring anytime soon.

We begin with number 1, CM Punk who entered first in the very last rumble he was a part of in 2014. Number 2 is Johnny Gargano. In these early stages I am just going to throw mini dream matches for Punk, mostly high work rate wrestlers. Finn Balor in at 3, Chad Gable in at 4 then Kofi Kingston at 5. We see a mini tag reunion for Punk and Kofi hitting some team moves and together they eliminate Gargano. Number 6 is JD McDonagh who immediately aids Balor from elimination and those 2 have each others backs for the time being. Shinsuke Nakamura enters at 7, mixes it up with everyone especially Balor, they have history. Tyler Bate enters at 8, I want to see him vs Gable so badly. Tommaso Ciampa enters at 9, he and Punk have a stare down before wrestling each other. As Damian Priest enters at number 10, Balor & JD are trying to eliminate Kofi and Priest yanks him out and eliminates him. There is no 'save spot' for Kofi this year. We have had 2 years of botches, we can let it rest. I gave the spot to Chelsea Green earlier because I thought it could be funny or entertaining. The 3 Judgement Day fellas start to really dominate the rumble now. Ridge Holland enters at 11 but is beaten down by the faction. They're standing tall and dominant when at number 12 comes the NXT North American Champion, Oba Femi. He tears through the Judgement Day single-handedly. He throws Chad Gable out. Bobby Lashley enters at 13, we have a big boy show down between him and Femi. They exchange back and forth, it is an even contest but the Judgement Day are back to ruin the fun. All 3 men eliminate Femi but Lashley survives. Number 14 we have Jey Uso who takes the fight to the Judgement Day but the numbers are too much. Priest eliminates Ciampa whilst Balor & JD eliminate Nakamura. Out at 15 is Pete Dunne, NOT Butch. The tease has happened and he will reappear at the rumble under his original alias. Dunne helps Bate and they fight off the Judgement Day together. Holland helps them before staring down Dunne and they have a fight.

Number 16 is R-Truth. The Judgement Day have been temporarily knocked down thanks to Bate, Dunne & Holland so Truth comes in to try and rally his "friends". Helps Priest and Balor up, he lifts up JD McDonagh and immediately throws him over the top rope. R-Truth starts trying to high-five the other members of Judgement Day but they beat him down. At 17 we get 'Dirty' Dominik Mysterio. He comes in and trash talks R-Truth and goes to throw him out, but Truth reverses and throws him over the top instead. He lasts maybe like 30 seconds or so. Priest then eliminates Truth. Entering at number 18, a returning Bo Dallas. He runs wild on everyone, hopefully as chants for Bray Wyatt fill the arena. At 19, NXT's Bron Breakker. Between Dallas & Bron, I want them to recreate that awesome moment we had on Raw between Wyatt and Roman Reigns. Dallas hits Holland with a Sister Abigail, he points a finger gun and at that moment Bron spears Lashley out of his boots. Cody Rhodes enters in at number 20. He and ally Jey Uso work together to eliminate both Priest & Balor from the match. Rhodes vs Punk stare down. Lashley attacks them both before they can get into it. Bron Breakker gets a shock elimination over Lashley. Sheamus makes his return from injury at number 22. He aligns with Holland to fight and eliminate Bate & Dunne. They celebrate together before Sheamus immediately eliminates him too. The Miz enters at number 22, followed by Karrion Kross at 23, flanked by his posse the Final Testament. They all lay waste to all of the competitors in the ring, whilst the Authors of Pain deliver beat downs to everyone Kross grabs the microphone and does a little promo about destruction or whatever. He calls themselves the most dominant force in wrestling. Kross eliminates Dallas and Breakker as the clock reaches zero.

Entrant 24, is Gunther, returning from a brief spell of absence. He chops down and destroys all of the final testament members before leathering Kross with strikes. He then gets into it with Rhodes, Sheamus & Miz who he has history with all 3 men. Less so Cody but they were the final two last year and it was awesome. Sami Zayn enters at 25, he hypes himself up to face Gunther but it is a struggling uphill battle. Gunther just murders anyone in his path. Until number 26 enters, Brock Lesnar. We get the big stare down, the holy shit chants, the hype from commentary of a dream match. They go at for a brief period but Brock overcomes and eliminates Gunther. I know, people may not like that but the plan is to have Gunther vs Lesnar at Wrestlemania and it doesn't need to be about championships. Gunther has been dominant for a year, but Lesnar embarrassed him here, the Ring General will want vengeance. Lesnar squares off with old rivals Rhodes and Punk, he then eliminates Karrion Kross, Sheamus & The Miz. Lesnar is pounding on Jey when number 27 enters, Jimmy Uso. He tries to help his brother from the assault. The brothers briefly form an alliance and together the Uso's eliiminate Lesnar with a barrage of Superkicks. Jimmy tries to offer a hug, Jey accepts it. Jimmy swerves and goes to eliminate Jey but he saw it coming, turning the tables and Jimmy is eliminated instead. That story can also continue through till Wrestlemania. Rey Mysterio enters at 28, then Drew McIntyre at 29 who has claymores for everyone. He sees Punk and they start fighting. Punk hits him with a GTS to get the upper hand. He stands to take a breather whilst number 30 comes out.

John Cena. Cena enters and he and Punk have a face to face and an exchange of words, it would be such a cool moment. They have in interaction with each other, as well as with Rey Mysterio since all 3 men were WWE champions near around the same time. We get a series of mini matches but Drew comes and spoils the fun. He has a claymore for Rey and eliminates him. He then chucks Sami Zayn out and then has a claymore for Cena who is eliminated. The final four is Drew, Rhodes, Punk and Jey. During the four-way stand-off, Seth Rollins comes out and pulls at CM Punk's leg distracting him enough to eat a claymore by Drew McIntyre and be eliminated. Rollins cost Punk his shot at a Wrestlemania main event. Drew dominates but he is outsmarted by Jey Uso who manages to eliminate him. Leaving us with Cody and Jey. We get a good 5-10 minute match between the two friends, ultimately though it is Cody Rhodes who books his ticket to finish his story at Wrestlemania.

I usually don't like people winning more than 2 rumbles, but I don't see any other way. I think Rollins costing Punk is a far more intriguing road to take instead of Punk just winning. Now Punk has more hoops to jump through to get what he wants. I would make sure the Undisputed title match happens after this rumble, because I would have Randy Orton defeat Roman Reigns for the championship. Both Cody or Jey would be real possible opponents for Reigns as champion, but Orton as champion leaves Cody as the clear favourite., They have so much history together, also Cody Rhodes has never beaten Orton before (not including multi-man matches). Cody's story isn't beating Roman Reigns. His story is becoming WWE Champion. He can beat Reigns later if he has to. People are too fixated on Cody needing to defeat Reigns. This means we can have Orton vs Rhodes, Punk vs Rollins and Reigns vs Rock at Wrestlemania. I am going to Philly to watch it, so that would be just the fucking best. Also set up; Gunther vs Brock Lesnar and Jimmy Uso vs Jey Uso. Pretty stacked huh? I found booking the men's rumble harder but I think I included enough storytelling and moments for it to be a very enjoyable watch.

So there. That is how I would book the rumbles because I am a wrestling savant. Thanks for checking it out. I'm sorry about the cursed AI generated photo for this article, except I'm not sorry at all.


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